What Is The Word?

What Is The Word?

What is that one quality that describe you the most?
No this is not an interview question for some MBA exam. I really want to write this.

What is that one quality? Do you see that for your life you chose difficult choices to happen and you would say that "Courage" is something that defines you the most. Or is it a simply "Simplicity". What is it ? Is it a random thing like "Rebellion" or is it "Bonhomie". What is it that abstract word that describes you?Your friends might not necessarily agree to it, but this one word is an assurance deep down in your heart that makes you "You". It is your own view of yourself. Finding this word might even guide you through quite a few decisions in your life. Is that word "Love" or is it "unlucky". Are you the one with "Optimism" or the one with "Cynicism". It might be something you dont want to put it out to the world, but you know deep inside. It might be one of your worst fears, it might be "insecurity" and it might be "Confidence" on the other end.

As much as the word would typecast you and put you in a silo, it would make you unique. It gives your character that unique strength that comes out of knowing one's self.

Its quite difficult to deal with this abstract ideas that goes in the realm of psychology and self-search. It doesnt come easily. Neither the search of the word nor the strength to accept it comes easily. It takes you through the difficult confessions and it takes you through your life like going through flashbacks to define yourself. But say now you know what that word is.

That single word, that identifies you the most. That describes you. That quality that makes you stand tall and different. What if, one fine day you see yourself going weak on this quality? What if you "Courage" fails you one day when you need to take a plunge in through a small decision of life? What if your confidence goes weak in its leg as you stand infront of a crowd talking about your best work? What if the rebellion in you starts feeling that the world will remain the same and you will have to change? What if the bonhomous part of you gets a little cynical? It would distrub you. And,I feel, it would disturb you the most. Even a single thing, even a smallthought that affects this one-word abstract quality of yours happens, you would feel disarrayed. You would want to cry, without knowing the reason why. You would feel disenchanted with everything around. You will feel disconnected with yourself. It would bring those moments when in the loneliness of your room, you just stare the roof and you think you are without any thoughts. You are not. Your self concept has been hit. You need to come over it soon. And you need to restore your basic quality. You need to reconstruct "Yourself".

P.S. : I think for me "Patience" is the word. Trying to reconstruct myself:).

A Poem : Baarish Ka Kankaal Ye Baadal

सूखे खेत की चारपाई से, नंगा आसमान तकता हू,
नीले कफ़न की चादर ओढ़े, बारिश का कंकाल ये

बादलज़मींदारो के क़र्ज़ में डूबे बीवी के गहने बच्चों का खाना,
बिन बरसे हर कतरेका मोल , जी का है जंजाल ये बादल

पिछले बरस आया था ऐसे, कुछ खुशिओ के दाम चुकाने,
हवा के झोकें से बिखरा था, बिन बारिश कंगाल ये बादल

शाम की रोटी, मुन्ने की फीस, बीवी का गहना, तेरा सपना ये ही है,
बस ये ही है, तू आँखों में आश में संभाल ये बादल

पहचान से मेरी पिछले बरस कुछ नेता माँगने आए थे,
उनके लिए सत्ता ही सब, कभी महाराष्ट्र कभी बंगाल ये बादल

Poem : दो बिछ्डे भाई

दो भाई ओ की अनोखी एक बात सुनो तुम,
कुछ वक़्त तक दोनो चले साथ सुनो तुम,
एक था तेज़, एक अपाहिज,
एक की दुनिया, एक की ख्वाहिश,
एक की ज़िंदगी कुछ पाने की चाह,
एक का खाना, दो रोटी संग चा,
एक फॅशन का बादशाह है
एक शर्दि में नंगा काँप रहा है
एक रहता है ३८ वी मंज़िल पे,
एक जो नीचे पहरा देता है ,
एक की चोट पे दुनिया रोती है,
एक की मौत पे घरवाले भी नही ,
एक नया है, संग दुनिया के हंस रहा है ,
एक बीमार सा दुनिया को ताने कस रहा है
एक का चेहरा अख़बारों की सुर्खी
एक बेचेहरा सा मौत के आँकड़ों में है
जब से बिछ्डे है तब से बिगड़े है ,
कोई कोशिश नही करता मिलाने की,
या फिर वो मिलना ही नही चाहते है,
एक झूझता रहेगा, एक जीता रहेगा दुनिया,
एक गावों में पलता भारत, एक शहेरो का इंडिया

A Poem - Writer's Block

सोचता हू ,
क्या लिखू, के दुनिया की एक नयी ही तकदीर नक्श हो,
क्या लिखू, के दुनिया की एक नयी तस्वीर भी अक्स हो,

क्या लिखू, के सियासतदार भूल जाए जंग कीबातें ,
क्या लिखू के फिर ख्वाबिदा नौजवान कल के गीत गाते,
क्या लिखू के गोलिया स्कूल के कानो में ना चीखे,
क्या लिखू के डोलिया दहेज की कहानियाँ ना लिखे,
क्या लिखू के भूखो की बस्ती में रोज़ पकवान बन जाए,
क्या लिखू के सूखे खेत में मरनेवाला ना कोई शक्स हो,

सोचता हू ,
क्या लिखू, के दुनिया की एक नयी ही तकदीर नक्श हो,
क्या लिखू, के दुनिया की एक नयी तस्वीर भी अक्स हो,
क्या लिखू जो रोक पाए बढ़ता काला धुआ चमन की ओर,
क्या लिखू जोउलज़े नौजवान उठ ले थामे वतन की डोर,
क्या लिखू के बच्चों को खेल के इस भीड़ से मैदान मिल जाए ,
क्या लिखू के बुड्ढे झुकते पेड़ थोड़े से सहारे से खिल जाए,
होसला दे जो सफ़र में थके काफ़िर मुसाफिर को इबादत का,
क्या लिखू के प्यार-दोस्ती-अमन ही यहा सबका लक्ष हो,
सोचता हू ,
क्या लिखू, के दुनिया की एक नयी ही तकदीर नक्श हो,
क्या लिखू, के दुनिया की एक नयी तस्वीर भी अक्स हो,
सोचता हू,
लिखू तू क्या लिखू, ये या वो, कुछ समज में नही आ रहा,
सोचता हू,
लिखू तो क्या लिखू, लिखने से कुछ बदल भी नही पा रहा

A Song - Kunwarji

(Inspired By a Song "Chawk Purao, Mangal Gao .... ". Trying hands on something different than what I have written earlier)

Thought : A woman whose husband is on a short trip outside their village just after their marriage, longs for him. She knows he will be coming soon, and she wants to enjoy her life only with him. She awaits his return sitting on the porch of their house and sings.

ओ बहती ठंडी पुरवई,
मीठी हँसी तू ले आई,
सपने आँखों में नये ले आना,
जाओ,
कुंवर जी आए तब तुम आना,

गैया की गले की घंटी गाती है,
सुबह सवेरे एक मुर्गे के संग,
बँध बियाहे बक्से से गाए कंगन,
साज़ पुरावे मेहेदि के रंग,
सब वाट देखत जाए मोरे संग,
ऐसा संगीत रोज़ ना बजाना,
जाओ,
कुंवर जी आए तब तुम आना,

खेत-हरियाली सिंचते पानी ये जु,
मिट्टीसे बारिश की आवे खुसबु,
तेरे लिए धीमी आँच पे है रोटी,
नीवाला एक
मुझको खिलाना, एक तू खाना,
जाओ री यादें,
कुंवर जी आए तब तुम आना,
सपने आँखों में नये ले आना,
जाओ,
कुंवर जी आए तब तुम आना

A Chhotu Poem and a hair cutting salon

Chhotu Poem - Pa-Ma-Ma-Pa
Son, I hear a faint sigh coming from you in sleep,

I wonder what are you seeing in your dreams deep,

Is it the fear that for office we might leave you?

Is it speed's thrill that you felt in your pram new,

I hear another sigh from you, I wonder without worry,

I see your Mom, in panic, she knows you are hungry,

See that is the difference,

You might be my son, my heart closest to thee,

But loving like your mother, Son, I can never be.

P.S: Conversation at a Hair cutting salon (Let me call it hair styling, as it was one of those types jaha "Baal bhi kat jaye aur pata bhi na chale")

Mahesh (The stylist :)) : Aapke baal ache hai. We will give it a different look.

Me : ***Confused Look*** Umm.. Ok... Just make sure my friends dont laugh at me in office

Mahesh : Not at all sir, This slant in your hairs can be given a great cut. If you do it at Loreal, They charge you 350, I will charge 50.

Me : *** Confused*** Why would I go to L'Oreal? I need a haircut, tu bindaas apni style se kaat.

Mahesh : Nahi sir, aage se ekdum Zigzag katenge, Just like Ranbir Kapoor!

Me : ***Confused Again *** Ok!

Mahesh : Piche baalo ko thoda kaan pe dhala hua rakhna sir, we will give you a Shahid Kapoor style over ears.

Me: ***Confused to a point of running away *** Shahid Kapoor!

Mahesh : Sir, Film wala. Aap Picture nahi dekhte kya?

Me: Nahi.

Mahesh : ****Confused****

Me : Ek star ka pata hai mujhe uske jaisa kaat paoge?

Mahesh : Try karoong kaun sir?

Me : Naresh Kanodia

Mahesh : ***Confused to death ****

Me: Chhod ... Jaisa kaat na hai kaat
For Reference here is a Naresh Kanodia pic. The guy in the golden boots.



Awesome Hair cutting salon, I am going there next time even if its just passable, It is entertaining. If you find me somewhere do tell me that my hairs just above my ears, look like Shahid Kapoor, I will complement Mahesh.

26/11 - Un Hazaaron Ke Naam

(Wrote this on my company blog on 26/11. )
We got to do our bit. We owe it to those who are ready to sacrifice their life for us.

It has been one year today. Hardly anything has changed. We still feel the same hatred for our politicians; we still fight in the name of Maharashtra and Karnataka and Hindus and Muslims. We still dont vote. We still use our pirated softwares and music and movies and try to justify it saying everyone else is doing it dont tell me. We still bribe the traffic police. We still breed corruption. We still feel good when we read about India's progress and we roll up our car glasses when some beggar is troubling us at the red light. We still have a volatile temper and a simple candid comments like "Cattle class" and "Nobel for filth" irritates us. we still dont like facing the mirror.

What did we see in this year? Raju's Satyam, Kasab's Biryani, Koda's Money, Liberhan Commissions REPORT!, A messed up Pakistan, a ruined western Economy, an unacceptable but played-down chinese statements, a nuclear deal, ministers we were angry on getting reinstated,

what has changed? NOTHING MUCH.

Ok, I agree we have a strong stand now to get the terrorists from Pakistan, but that is as much because of weakening Pakistan as for force of our statement. India is rising, but that isn't because of some great changes, most of it is "NATURAL ECONOMICS".

For a real change one thing and the most important thing that we as a country needs to come over is the corruption of Morales that we have bred in ourselves. Let us understand, it's not OK to bribe people; it's not ok to use pirated stuff; it's not ok to let others vote undesrving candidate to power; lipservice is not ok, we need to do whatever little we can; its not ok to FORGET those scars and say "Let us get over the attacks" "Let us think of other things - Who will be going out from big boss today?", we need to do our bit and we must do it.

Especially for people who write blogs or writes, this writing their views on these stuff is very important. We need to praise and keep praising our heroes who faught for us. Even when making movies and writing books on it sounds like creating business of pain, it has to be done for generations to keep the wounds alive. We need to criticize the people who ought to be criticized. We need to gel with each other so that no one can spark fights dividing us on language and religion or Region. We need to come over Hate politics and hate mentality. We need to keep our emotional bond to these issues strong. We need not forget the thousands dieing on the border and in the country to terrorism and feuds. Let us create a positive world in whatever little way we can.

A small poem of my thoughts :
एक साल बीत गया,

जलती चित्ता, मकान, जलते बदन, सब बुझ रहा है,

कुछ दाग रह गये है, पर वो मेरे बदन पर नही,

थोड़ा सा दुख हुआ था, देख जलते लोग मुझे,

पर वो चित्ता मेरी ना थी, मेरा ना था मकान,

अब सब बुझ रहा है,

बुझ रही है लौ, जो जली थी उन अंगारो से,

बुझ रही है वो, जो लगी थी खून के धारो से,

बुझ रहा है जुनून, जिसपे कसमे ली गयी थी,

लौट आ रहा है सुकून, जिसकी कमी रही थी,

शहीदो की चित्ता की तपिश भी बुझ रही है,

ज़मीर की वो खोटी खलिश भी बुझ रही है,

बुझ रहा है सूरज, जो जला था आग की लपटो से,

बुझ रहा है ईमान, जो जागा उन कुछ हफ़्तो में,

सब कुछ बुझ रहा है,

सब कुछ बुझ रहा है,

क्योकि वो दाग मुझपे ना थे,

क्योकि वो लोग मेरे ना थे,

क्योकि उस आग ने मेरा घर ना जलाया था,

क्योकि मेरे ज़मीर पे मेरी ख़ुदगरजी का साया था,

क्योकि उस दिन गोलिओ पे नाम मेरा ना था,

क्योंकि सब मेरे है, ये गुमान भी मेरा ना था,

क्या मुझे इंतेज़ार है, की मेरे अपनो की मौत मुझे जगाएगी?

क्या मुझे इंतेज़ार है, की कोई आएगा और दुनिया बदल जाएगी?

सब बुझ रहा है,

क्योकि मेरी सोच, मेरा ईमान,

क्योकि मेरा धर्म मेरा ग्यान,

ससब अंगारों में सर्द जम रहे है,

सब बुझ रहा है

सब बुझने ना दो

There was a movie made on this, quite dramatic but a weak cinematic piece. The incidence deserves much better. I was thinking about the characters and their backstories, it must have been very painful for all.

घाव से बहता गर्म लहू , ठंडे प्लॅटफॉर्म पे बहके जम रहा है,

"ये तू ना हो" सोच एक कदम मेरा बढ़ रहा एक थम रहा है,

घर जाने को उत्सुक थैला, वो पीली चुनर शायद प्यार की भेंट,

वो स्कूल बॅग से निकली किताबें, वो जवान जिस्म के फटे पेट,

खून से लथपथ प्लॅटफॉर्म पे, मेरे बुढ्ढे कदम लड़खड़ाते है,

आखरी साँस लेते कुछ तुझसे बच्चे आगे ही फड़फड़ाते है,

दोपहर तेरी आवाज़ में सुनके, वो क्रिसमस पे छुट्टी की बात,

सोचा शिमला की बर्फ़ीली चमक, होगी मुन्ने के सपनो में आज

ये मौत का तांडव देख, मेरे संग तेरा भी मुन्ना सहम रहा है,

"ये तू ना हो" सोच एक कदम हमारा बढ़ रहा एक थम रहा है,

जलते गुंबज के नीचे खाक हुए बदन पे तुम्हारी ही शेरवानी है,

"ये तुम ही हो" सोच एक साँस में बिखरी अपनी प्रेम कहानी है,

मेहन्दी से कत्थई हाथ थे मेरे , शर्म से लाल तुम सेहरे में थे,

कत्थई आँखें अब लाल है मेरी, लाल हो तुम घाव गहरे ले के,

कितने साल हुए थे हम दोनो, बस इस दिन की ख्वाहिश में जीते थे,

मेरे होंठ को पास आते देख, आज के जैसे तुम तब भी आँखें मिचे थे,

"छोटे से घर में तुमसी राज कुमारी के संग, में राजा तू रानी है"

"ये तुम ही हो" सोच एक साँस में बिखरी अपनी प्रेम कहानी है,

(Here is something I wrote Last year, a day after the 26/11 incidence. I still feel guilty.
http://jkpcblogs.blogspot.com/2008/11/unanswered-questions-in-my-mind.html)

A Poem : Sunset at Marine Drive

सूरज डूब रहा है, गोल रोटी सा दूधिया पानी में,
खिचड़ी याद आती है, जो थी बीरबल की कहानी में,
दो रोज़ हुए मेरी खुद्दारी से भूख ने जंग सी ठानी है,
गाली खाई, है खाई मात, ये हवा भी तो सुहानी है,
आगे बैठे है इन दो जिस्मो की भूख अलग सी लगती है,
पिछे उन बड़ी इमारतो में सौदो की भूख अलग ही रहती है,
बचपन की याद तसवीरो सी आसमान पे दिखती है,
मेरी तीन-पहिया साइकल के पीछे, मा खाना ले चलती है,
लहराते इन बालों को देख याद आते है, मेरा गाँव, गेहू के खेत,
जहा कभी तुम ताने घूँघट लाती थी, झुंका के संग भाखर को सेक,
फिर एक मौसम बरसात ना आई, फिर एक मौसम बरबादी थी ,
जिस रोज़ आया था यहा पे कमाने में, तब छोटि की भी शादी थी,
अब कोई साथ नही है, अब खुशी वाली कोई भी बात नही है,
भूख है, और भूख के बाद, याद नही अब कुछ है,
थोड़े से जो पैसे मिलते, तुमको भेजा करता हू,
फिर कभी सागर के आगे ढलते सूरज संग ढलता हू,
वो देखो,
सूरज डूब रहा है, गोल रोटी सा दूधिया पानी में,
भूख की आग लगी है जैसे बुढ़ापा हो जवानी में,
उसपे भी ये बात, कल कुछ लोगो ने बतलाई
मुझेचोरी की है रोटी ये जो आज यहा में ख़ाता हू,
वो कहते है ये मेरा देश नही, वो कहते है, में यहा क्यों आया हू,
वो कहते है मेरी वजह से कुछ लोग यहा पे भूखे है,
वो कहते है में यहा रुकु तो , खून के नाले छूटेंगे,
क्या बताउ उनको, मुझको उनकी बात का डर नही,
तुम मारो या मरु में भूख से, वापस नही में जाऊँगा,
जब तक हू यहाँ, जब तक हू ज़िंदा, ये भूख मेरे घर
नहीतुम सियासत के पाले हो तुम भूख की बातें क्या जानो ,
यहा आओ , बैठो मेरे पास, देखो,
सूरज डूब रहा है, गोल रोटी सा दूधिया पानी में,

The Band's Visit- Bikur Ha-Tizmoret (2007)

We watch movies to learn a new story. I love movies with strong story line. The Band's visit scraps this thing right from the first scene. It is about a story that can be told in 2 lines. So its not about the story.

Let me summarize the story here "A Police band from Egypt who is visiting Israel for a performance in the culture center, loses its way to end up in an unknown town with few of the local characters. Next day they take the bus to their culture center."

It is a story about common people and these common people share the same problems whether it be Egypt or Israel. Arabs and Israelis - However different with their animosities on the world political stage has a common thread of humanism in between them. A story about Arabs and Jews hence has a context and that context is something that the movie tries to negate.

The narrative of this movie and the visual style of presentation is quite unlike other things that I have scene. The pictures don't give you the characters and emotions first, it just gives you an empty frame, with the background that would be for the next scene. It stays on those houses or desert or buildings for a moment longer than what you expect. It gives a very different feel to the movie. It makes you belong to the places it sees. For example, you see this huge house, and the trees around - still silent. You wait someone would come out of it. A moment passes, you suddenly start enjoying looking at the house, a man walks in front of the house slowly, its that man you follow in the next scene. The whole idea was to show a set of people lost in a Foreign land in between foreign people and this simple techinique goes a long way to give you that feel. Consider this, the first scene of the movie too, there is this car that stands at the airport. A man comes out puts something in the back of the van, comes ahead, it takes a second longer than you expect, and then the car moves, as you expect to follow that van, but what you see is, on the other side of the van stands 8 men dressed in bright bluish uniform, standing in an impeccable queue, lead by a general.

Simple things like accent, dressing that makes human different are beautifully portrayed, and more beautifully portrayed are those human emotions that make people across the world similar. It shows the feeling of loneliness that binds Tawfeeq Zackaria (The General) and Dina (The rude restauant owner). It shows the emotion of love for children and usual fights with wife, that binds the other 2 characters. It shows how a casanova-ish Arab teaches a clue less Israeli how to get the girl. 3 of the band memebers living with a family, binds over a song on the dinner table. Simple things yet impactful. Music too weaves the movie beautifully. Especially the scene where the second in command talks about his composition and the practice that the 3 of the band memebers do in the silence of the night and the last performance. Interesting perspectives make this movie special.

There are a few really good scenes that lingers on your mind after the movie. One that I remember right away is when one of the band memeber is waiting for Egyptian Embassy's call at a phone booth, and on the same phone another Israeli is waiting for a call from his girlfriend and the phone rings, both wants to pick up but the courtsey in them wantst the other to pick the phone first. The ring goes on, you expect something dramatic like the phone ring gets over, but just at the last moment the one who is lost and waiting for his embassy's call picks it up. Simple scene but beautiful. Another one is when Tawfeeq tells Dina how "Music is not important" these days and also on a bench when he tells her about "Fishing" being the best thing to do in life. You sit, you listen to the waters and the bird chirp in Symphony. He says he likes fishing but never gets fishes and if he gets he lets them go back in water. The whole point of enjoying the act more than the result, makes life interesting. Dina, a rash woman with a messed up life, appreciates that. She always felt liek a loser, and a small nod from a dignified Tawfeeq, who tells her that "you are a good woman", makes her feel special.

Actors in the movie are first rate and are very believable. Sasson Gabai as Tawfeeq and Ronit Elkabetz as Dina were exceptional inin my point of view. But its the other departments that make the movie special. The art direction (Nikolai Yosifov), the cinematography (Shai Goldman) and the direction (Eran Kolirin) gives this fairly low-budget movie a real good look. A special mention needs to be given to the film editor (Aric Leibovitch) who adds those extra-moments in the prelude scenes of the symphonic sequences that follows.

All in all , do watch it if you get time, its about simple things that make life and bonding with others special.
You might find this movie being played on UTV world movies sometimes.
The Band's Visit- Bikur Ha-Tizmoret (2007)
Language : Arabic / English / HebrewRunning
Time : 87 Minutes
Writer / Director : Eran Kolirin